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Free Term Paper Sample
All parents have ways of dealing with children and their behavior other than the physical laying on of hands. These comprise a variety of methods, many of which are identified in our case material. In four families, the customary device employed by the parents was to deprive the children of things or privileges which were much prized. This might mean the withholding of allowances, refusal of permission to play with the other children, absence from the movies, and the like. In ten families, the informants stressed the careful supervision and strict management by the parents, most often by the mother. Such management might be quite pervasive, to the point of being smothering, and was so described in several cases. The comments of the informants about their mothers in these cases are interesting. "She always knew what was going on." "She understood us better than we did ourselves." "Mother was a darned shrewd manager and manipulator." "Mother possessed that fortunate faculty of bringing about a desired result without seeming to use force or being possessive."
Akin to the emphasis upon management were the references to the organizing abilities of one or both parents. Illustrative of this was a family with thirteen children. Here the parents stimulated active participation in school, church, and community activities, canalizing the energies of the entire family group in these directions. In addition, a strong sense of family pride was fostered, with the result that two informants from this family insisted that there had been no disciplinary problems in it. Child rearing in this case appears as incidental to the functioning of a well-organized family life.
Emphasis upon a parent's capacity for leadership, expressed by the informants in eight families, is perhaps but another way of referring to the type of situation that has just been described. "My mother," writes a member of an intellectual family, "was not only an excellent manager and housekeeper, but she often was the leader in our activities and discussions. Mother was well read, she had a deep sense of understanding, about all kinds of things. True, she could be very critical of our friends, and several times forbade us to associate with persons we brought home. Yet withal, she had great confidence in us, and in turn we trusted her judgment.
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